Category: I BS

It pretty summarized my half-day out in the rain.

better not to mention my new hairstyle though.

I have this random thought to study china-russia relations
but just realized there is only ONE course about russia in MIT..
suen so

Clinton’s visit makes my day.
Who cares his affairs, he is a classy & powerful negotiator.

beyoni says: (1:36:06 PM)
不是啦
beyoni says: (1:36:21 PM)
他超怕我想回去美國
beyoni says: (1:36:43 PM)
因為他有一個朋友呢，一去不回 ，連那個朋友的爸媽死掉都不回來
Yih says: (1:36:52 PM)
= =
Yih says: (1:37:00 PM)
that’s just 不肖 xu
beyoni says: (1:37:02 PM)
娶了一個美國人
beyoni says: (1:37:15 PM)
兒子都不懂講廣東話了
beyoni says: (1:37:33 PM)
就像呢，我家有個朋友在ucla讀eecs
beyoni says: (1:38:06 PM)
然後做明星
beyoni says: (1:38:21 PM)
所以媽媽說 我讀甚麼都可以 但不喜歡讀電腦的
beyoni says: (1:40:02 PM)
我發現我有太多話都放在心裡沒有抒發了
beyoni says: (1:41:01 PM)
還有他們都想我從政
beyoni says: (1:41:13 PM)
爸爸常常說 我口才好。。。＝。＝ 
beyoni says: (1:41:28 PM)
但在家裡其實 只有他在說話而已
beyoni says: (1:42:04 PM)
我覺得從政是可以啦 我也沒有甚麼preference
Yih says: (1:42:04 PM)
do u wanna do politics?
beyoni says: (1:43:02 PM)
基本上 我覺得 我可塑性 是挺高的說
beyoni says: (1:43:14 PM)
不知道啦。gwa
beyoni says: (1:43:40 PM)
所以我覺得 我這種人 再講興趣已經沒用啦
beyoni says: (1:44:21 PM)
因為我沒有興趣 還有讀甚麼也不會太差
例如 寫東西可以 科學都ok 啦
beyoni says: (1:44:51 PM)
所以經過一年
beyoni says: (1:45:11 PM)
你覺得 我像做甚麼的人？
beyoni says: (1:45:16 PM)
我看了20年都不懂。
beyoni says: (1:51:18 PM)
我真的妒忌那些明白自己喜歡甚麼／未來堅決要做甚麼的人，太幸福了
beyoni says: (1:51:41 PM)
我亂打亂撞很久了gwagwa

in the dream….^^”

so I forgot why I born a baby boy
then the little baby is put ony my bro’s bed (old setting of the room)
I looked at the eye of that cute baby, he is crying, then when I touched his hand
he stopped crying. then I think , is he really my baby?

then I brought the baby to my parents’ room
with the baby boy in my arm, I sat on the bed, with dad and mum and bro there.
Then we started to think about what name should the baby have.
after having so many suggestions, we just realized that 男方改中文名、女方改英文名

and then next scene is , I brought my baby boy to a restaurant to meet family friends.
they all stared at the baby and me very weirdly, seems they don’t dare to ask what happened.
But I bravely, and a bit shyly, told everyone that, the baby is mine.

And the best part is, my baby could already speak.
AND I STRTAED TO SEARCH AT mit WEBSITE..IF THERE IS ANY REDUCED TUITION FEE FOR PREGNANT STUDENT =.===

For today, my long-term goal is:

1) M.Sc at Harvard/ Stanford / Tsinghua/ PekingU/TokyoU graduating at 2014
(…alright, I know wht u are thinking, I know im not THAT smart, thank you)

2) If not, I will go back to Hong Kong right after grad

a) Consulting Firms
(quite sure my bro will discourage me from doing this)

b) Government, AO or EPD
(but my lang skill is just not good enough for AO…im as shy as a shrimp)

c) HK universities
(and now u think u r one of those superior intellectuals?)

d) Financial institutions
(u just said u hate ibank!)

e) Be a Pig
(yes, this is the most honest self, cheers)

again, it is only for today.
always tentative to change

so in order to achieve my long-term goal:

1) got really good academic result (5.0)

2) gain more research experience (UROP please and learn JAVA)

3) be career-wise competitive by doing internships (M1ST1 JAPAN!!)

4) further improve my interpersonal skills (write more blogs! 誤)

5) and those stuffs I wrote before about ennoblement, haha.

Read Only/ Read and Write?

未解決。
Am I suitable for / Am I strong at/ Do I like:
academics / career?
science / arts/ engineering/ econ/ finance/ research?
government/ ibank/ consulting/ R&D/ media?
public speaking/politics/ opinion?

I am already almost 20 years old
and still i have no effing idea What I am
how can an individual with
no talent, no passion, no interest, no preference for 20 years..
pave a unique path for herself..given that being random is not a choice?

i’m still so “undeveloped”
and I have spent so much time “exploring” different area of interests…
and the fact is nothing interests me particularly…dang ._.
after a quarter of a lifetime, I am still confused about who am i …how pathetic.

Future is really sth BEYOND IMAGINATION.
it’s out of bound, its like
how can you imagine an Earth-sized asteroid crash on Jupiter???
A CRASH creating an EARTH?
my future is as unimaginable as this.

i can’t  even identify myself
im always changing
and im always hiding some, and showing some…
ai …. ng g dim

They say bad luck comes in 3’s.
I think that I got signs of Stockholm syndrome. (<–click for wiki)
(its really nothing too well-known,
somehow I’ve read it from a book some years ago…
hmm suddenly recalled it after one night of worrying,)

though might not be 100% appropriate, or even a bit exagerrating,
it might kind of explain why I would start to idolize kazu sempai
or would even feel thankful to my source of worries these days.

hmm 被略施小惠 is the point. hahha

p.s. stephen colbert is really the king of satire hahaha

童年你與誰渡過　聖詩班中唱的歌
再哼一哼可以麼
當時誰與你排著坐　白色恤衫灰褲子
再穿一穿可以麼

遺憾我當時年紀不可親手擁抱你欣賞
童年便相識　餘下日子多閃幾倍光
誰讓我倒流時光一起親身跟你去分享
能留下印象　閱覽你家中每道牆
拿著你歌書　與你合唱

從前你與誰路過　逛的公園有幾多
再走一走可以麼
當時誰對你凝望過　是否真的比我多
再演一演可以麼

遺憾我當時年紀不可親手擁抱你欣賞
童年便相識　餘下日子多閃幾倍光
誰讓我倒流時光一起親身跟你去分享
遺憾印象　沒有你家中那面牆
拿著你相簿

從前拍過的相
多麼妒忌你昨日同過的窗
早些看著你美麗模樣
對你天真的讚賞
從頭細看　你六歲當天　已是我偶像